Malay Ride (Recession Remix) 

[On Consumerism]

To "Sleigh Ride"

(Words by Mitchell Parish

Music by Leroy Anderson)

Parody Lyrics by Marcy Shaffer

Arranged by Greg Hilfman

JUST HEAR BEIJING-JING-JINGLING.
KRIS KRING-KRINGLING, TOO.
THE MALL WILL CALL A-COURTIN'
WITH ALL SANTA'S IMPORTIN' FOR YOU.
 
PERHAPS SOME SQUARE BANDANAS
FROM THE MARIANAS WILL DO.  
DON'T STALL, IT ISN'T SPORTIN'.
WITH ALL SANTA'S IMPORTIN' FOR YOU.
 
VIETNAM IS DA BOMB 
WHEN A MOM CAN SHOP
FOR PRICES THAT DROP.
WHY STOP 'CAUSE HANOI'S 
GIRLS AND BOYS CHOP-CHOP?
IF IT'S MADE IN FREE TRADE? 
IT'S OK'D, AND THEY'VE
BEEN TOLD TO BEHAVE.
SO WHAT IF YOUR GUT SAYS: 
"YOU MUTT!  
THIS WAS MADE BY A MAIDEN SLAVE!" 
 
YOU'RE WISHIN' FOR THAT 
HIGH DEFINITION TV CONTROL.
HOW DROLL THEY SAY "FROM POLAND." 
'CAUSE THAT'S POLISH FOR THE NORTH POLE.
 
COME HAUL YOUR CART AND PLUNDER 
THROUGH EACH SMALL WONDER IN VIEW. 
WAL-MART IS NEVER SHORT IN 
ALL THAT SANTA'S IMPORTIN' FOR YOU.
 
IN DECEMBER AS YOU'RE ZOOMING 
TOWARD A CASH ADVANCE.
JUST REMEMBER THAT CONSUMING 
IS LIKE BRASH ROMANCE.
OH, THE PLEASURE IS DOUBLE 
WHEN A BUBBLE FLOATS YOU TO THE TOP.
THOUGH THE RUB IS: 
THE BUBBLE OFTEN VOTES TO POP.
POP POP POP.
 
YOU ARE GLOBAL, PHONES ARE MOBILE. 
AND THE WORLD'S YOUR STORE.
WHAT IF SCHOLARS SCRAWL THE DOLLAR'S FALL
 MEANS LESS IS MORE.
EFFERVESCE AT THE JOY THAT EVERY TOY 
WILL EFFORTLESSLY SPREAD.
DON'T STRESS OR THINK "WRETCHED EXCESS." 
WHEN THE TESTERS CONFESS THERE'S LEAD!
 
JUST HEAR BEIJING-JING-JINGLING,
KRIS KRING-KRINGLING, TOO.
THE MALL WILL CALL A-COURTIN'
WITH ALL SANTA'S IMPORTIN' FOR YOU.
 
PERHAPS A FEATHER BOA --
(HELLO, SAMOA!) --
WILL DO.  
YOO HOO!
DON'T STALL, IT ISN'T SPORTIN'
WITH ALL SANTA'S IMPORTIN' FOR YOU.
COME HAVE A BALL CAVORTIN',
WITH ALL SANTA'S IMPORTIN' FOR YOU!

JANIS LIEBHART - LEAD VOCAL, BACKGROUND VOCAL

GREG HILFMAN - MUSIC DIRECTOR

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